silent scream

yes, i know i havent posted in a while. ive been on the highway to hell. i just want to scream but my housemates already think im loud. im tempted to throw up to make myself feel better. somehow i feel that would only make things worse. its like the sick feeling after you see somebody puke and you also want to puke because its just so disgusting. as i am writing this im picturing it in my mind, and it makes me want to vomit even more... and so the vicious cycle begins.